As hard as this may be to believe, there are fans of the ''Dog the Bounty Pic Hunter'' television show who can read and write — after a fashion.

On Tuesday, I lamented the fact that a thug like Duane ''Dog'' Chapman is portrayed as a hero when genuine heroes and heroines get less acclaim (and smaller paychecks). I had in mind the gallant woman who foiled a rape on Sept. 14, after another thug abducted her in a brutal carjacking at the Lehigh Valley Mall.

I noted Chapman's extensive criminal record and his years in prison (accessory to murder involving his biker gang's drug transaction). But those little imperfections should not be mentioned, I've learned since that column found its way to the Internet.

Dog, you see, is a true-blue, Bible-thumping, holy-rolling Christian. (His biker gang gave him that nickname because it is ''God'' spelled backward.)

''You are obviously very misguided,'' wrote Barbara Reynolds of McKinney, Texas, who said Dog ''has become a born again, practicing Christian'' since his prison days.

''Shame on you,'' wrote Mike Mathewson of Tacoma, Wash., who said he met Dog and ''he was an alright guy.''

An e-mail letter from ''Squigspace'' said I failed to genuflect to Dog ''since your hero is Satan himself.'' When I replied to ask for a real name and address, Squigspace responded thusly: ''Eternal damnation calls for your soul.''

And so it went. Hallelujah.

I'd like to devote all of today's space to the hordes who told me about Chapman's holy roller and criminal-catching beneficences, but there is another aspect of the Lehigh Valley Mall carjacking episode that has been bothering me.

In that episode, a man pulled a knife on a woman in a mall parking lot, forced her into her car, drove away, sexually assaulted her as he drove, and finally demanded oral sex. When he pulled down his pants inside the speeding car, the woman jumped out rather than submit, and was severely injured. A suspect was later captured in Mississippi and faces a number of charges.

What would be the range of prison sentences, I asked Lehigh County district attorney, if the man is convicted of the single most serious charge?

''The likelihood of this guy getting convicted of only one charge is remote,'' Martin replied, but he said the range would be 10 to 20 years.

I also asked what could happen in a plea deal. ''That will not happen,'' he said.

As for sentences in general, how about possession of drugs with intent to deliver?

A second offense, Martin said, can bring up to 10 years.

Many drug offenses involve consenting adults who harm only themselves. But under the law, a man who savagely attacks a woman can get the same penalty for his worst crime as someone who had a large stash of marijuana to ease the torment of cancer.

And one of the most draconian features of drug law enforcement is that it lets unscrupulous prosecutors twist justice for their own benefit.

A few years ago, for example, I wrote about a Lehigh County case in which a drug wheeler-dealer bought a huge amount of speed in California, brought it back and gave it to a flunky to peddle here. The wheeler-dealer got five years in prison and the flunky got 24. Why? Because the wheeler-dealer ''cooperated'' with prosecutors and got a plea deal. (Martin, whom I respect, did not prosecute that case.)

That kind of corruption — along with laws that say harming ourselves is on a par with harming unwilling, innocent victims — reflects a system that is absolutely deranged.

It also may explain why, in some minds, a brutal abduction is not a big deal. After all, our own government is sending the message that it's not significantly worse than violating preposterous drug laws.

paul.carpenter@mcall.com 610-820-6176